Most of us spend the last few years of our working lives anxiously anticipating the moment we can retire. You can’t wait to get up when you want to every day and not have to deal with commuting or office politics. And most of all, you’re excited about all the fun things you’ll finally have time for.
But when retirement happens, it’s not always as blissful as you’d imagined. “The adjustment to retirement can be a challenging stage of life,” says Emanuel Maidenberg, PhD, clinical professor of psychiatry and biobehavioral sciences at the David Geffen School of Medicine at UCLA.
“You fantasize about having so much time, but then reality hits and you don’t know what to do with all that time."
With a little pre-retirement planning and post-retirement structure and support, however, you really can enjoy these work-free years.
Plan ahead for a happy retirement
When people hear the words “retirement planning,” they inevitably think of 401ks and other financial investments. But you also need to plan for the day-to-day realities of retirement.
“When you stop working, it frees up a huge amount of time,” says Dr. Maidenberg. “That can sound great, but it also requires some planning to figure out how you want to fill it."
He recommends devoting some time while you’re still working to envisioning your life post-work. “For 15 minutes a day, really try to visualize what your retirement days will look like,” he suggests. “Start at the beginning of a day and imagine yourself going through the day and what you will do.” As you think of things, jot them down.
This is your time to fill your days not just with the have-to’s, but also with your want-to’s. Coming up with ideas for enjoyable activities can help make the transition to retirement much more pleasurable.
Make a schedule (and stick to it)
Suddenly having no alarm, no stack of emails waiting to be read and no one watching when you get to your desk sounds blissful. But it can also mean waking up and feeling a bit lost in a day that has no structure to it.
“It’s important to plan your day and even go so far as to create a schedule,” says Dr. Maidenberg. That can include little things — such as coffee with a friend, a trip to the grocery store — as well as volunteer commitments, exercise and social plans.
“There’s a direct line between depressed mood and lack of activities,” he says. “If you have little to no activities planned during the day, there’s an increased risk of feeling depressed or hopeless.”
Stay physically and mentally active
People in their 80s have made news recently for physical achievements many (much younger) people can only dream of — such as hiking the Appalachian Trail and completing the Kona Ironman. While you don’t need to go to those extremes, staying fit and active is key to your overall physical and mental wellness in retirement.
Older adults, like everyone else, need at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity physical activity every week, plus some strength-building exercises. “Physical activity is the best way to protect yourself from a negative mood,” says Dr. Maidenberg. “And it can also be a great opportunity for social connection if you play a sport, take a class or find a walking partner.”
Mental activity is just as important as physical activity for keeping your brain sharp and engaged when you’re no longer working. Take a class, study a language or an instrument, join a book group or try any activity that engages your mind.
Find a purpose after retirement
Even people who didn’t truly love their jobs can feel a sudden lack of purpose once they retire. “People are often surprised to feel a loss of purpose, structure and social connection when they stop working,” says Dr. Maidenberg. “And these three things are extremely important to your mental health.”
As you plan for things you want to do in retirement, try to identify things that are most important to you. It could be more time with your family, building a community, traveling, exploring a new culture, engaging more in your spirituality or achieving a personal goal. “When you identify these things, it helps clarify the values and purpose that are important to you,” says Dr. Maidenberg.
When to seek help for mental health after retirement
“Most of us focus on the positives of retirement and the happiness we expect it to bring,” says Dr. Maidenberg. “But it can also bring difficult and challenging things that require some adjustment.”
If you find yourself coping with mental health challenges after retirement, know you’re not alone – and that you also don’t have to navigate it on your own.
Changes to your emotional health that you shouldn’t ignore include:
- Feelings of hopelessness
- Irritable mood
- Lack of patience
- Loss of interest in activities that once brought pleasure
- Persistent sadness
“Seeking help for emotional pain is no different than seeking help for any other sort of physical pain,” says Dr. Maidenberg. Just as with physical pain, if the problems persist, you should see a specialist.
